Becoming a dad is not difficult... or maybe it is?

"Honey, I think the baby is coming!" These are the most terrifying words that make all men sweat.

Once announced – there is no chance of turning back.

The sympathetic nervous system kicks in immediately, the pupils dilate and the adrenaline level skyrockets. No, the saber-toothed tiger is not at the door, but the birth of your child. I'm not sure which scenario seems more threatening to the male world. ?

The birth of a child is an immensely thrilling and emotional occasion for fathers-to-be, complete with total emotional mayhem.

Seeing your beloved wife in pain and not being able to do anything about it triggers a deep feeling of helplessness in many men. The completion of the birth and the first meeting with the much-anticipated baby, can crack the toughest men. The result is often tears of joy and pure happiness. 

Pregnancy and childbirth were still women's domains until a few decades ago. Instead of simply being present, today fathers-to-be are right in the middle of it from the beginning. It's fascinating to see how the fathers react to the ultrasound or the sound of their child's heartbeat. Participating in a birth preparation course with a partner is a given for many men, and it makes perfect sense. In the birthing process, the prospective father performs a critical role. 

Now that the above words have been spoken, what should you do?




First and foremost, stay calm, take a deep breath and allow yourself to be excited. Organize transportation to the hospital of your choice (private car, taxi, or ambulance if necessary), and notify them in advance. Grab your clinic bag and get ready to embark on your family excursion.

"WE have contractions every 10 minutes", says a man who appears to be out of breath.

 


I giggled to myself as I heard this phrase so many times at the delivery room door, and I appreciated the fact that the soon-to-be fathers celebrate this beautiful event "birth" with their wife and live it through with skin and hair. The men's first burden is lifted once they enter the protective confines of the delivery room. The pregnant woman and her unborn kid are safe and sound on the scene. In fact, I've been told by nightmare-plagued guys that they've been waking up sweaty at night since the 28th week of pregnancy, dreaming that they didn't make it to the clinic on time.

The first task would have been done successfully with the arrival in the delivery room.
Now, dear gentlemen, you can delegate every duty to the obstetric team and focus on your main task.

Lucia's second midwife tip is as follows:

  • Motivate your wife by telling her how well she's handling labor and how proud you are of her.
  • Remember the birth preparation class and ask if a back massage would be nice (my tip: actually ask your wife if she wants to be touched in the current situation)
  • Try to "simply" be there for your loved one, giving her the sense of being held and supported.
  • Another responsibility for soon-to-be fathers is to take photos. 

My urgent tip to you: a few weeks before the birth, talk to your wife about what can be photographed.
I've witnessed a few cases when the parents couldn't agree on how intimate the photo record should be, resulting in a fight in the delivery room.

Sincerely, Lucia

Lucia, a midwife from the beautiful Allgäu & real help for moms and dads, says:


"Dear papas!

Please look after yourself and your strength by bringing a small snack pack with you to the clinic, including chocolate bars, trail mix, power bars (for the superhero dad), and possibly chewing gum.

You fathers-to-be are crucial during labor since giving birth to a child is a tremendous physical and emotional struggle for an expectant mother. You are the much-needed support, the sense of safety and security. Nobody can motivate like you can during childbirth. Not to mention, no one can cut the umbilical cord except the new dad."

More guidance pages

Checklist for expectant fathers

Having children is one of the most dramatic changes in life, if not the biggest, for men too. Good preparation is therefore helpful and sensible, as it enables you as a man to prepare for the birth and your new role in the changed family structure.

Baby development - the beginning of a new life

Two tiny little cells that have fused together and lodged in your uterus will soon turn your life upside down - the exciting time of your pregnancy begins.

Preparing for birth and taking precautions

A birth preparation course will provide you with the opportunity to meet other expectant parents, learn essential details about the approaching birth, and get a wealth of practical knowledge on dealing with babies.